Love yourself, Love Ones You’re With

"You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with." ~Wayne Dyer (1940-, American Psychotherapist, Author, Lecturer).

I love that song about if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with. Now, I know it's really about cheating on your loved ones, and I truly disagree with that, but I don't ever think of the meaning of the lyrics when I hear it. I like the upbeat tempo and the tune. As they used to say on "American Bandstand," it has a good beat and you can dance to it! But if I want to think about the lyrics in a positive way, I can relate this very easily to loving myself. Even when the ME that I am is not the ME that I hope to become.

In fact, I doubt that I can become the ME I hope to become if I don't love the ME that I am right now. I have to love myself now because that's the only way I can take care of myself and try to make changes in my life that allow me to get to the ME that I want to become. If I don't love the ME that I am, I won't care if I make postive changes and do what's good for myself. I think that's how we disintegrate into people that we don't want to be.

We stop loving ourselves. We stop looking out for ourselves. We stop caring. The land of Not Caring is a bleak place to live. Have you ever heard someone say, "How could I have let myself go like this?" Listen to what they're really saying: "How could I have LET MYSELF GO like this?" You would never let go of the hand of a small child when crossing a busy street together. You would never let go of a loved one who needed your encouraging, loving arms around them. So, how can we let go of ourselves? We can't if we love ourselves and care about ourselves.

Now, the only companion we constantly have is ourselves. So, how would you like having a constant companion who you don't even like hanging around all the time? It sounds pretty depressing. But that ME isn't going anywhere. She's right here with me all the time. I may as well learn to love her. And I have to tell you the truth: loving anything or anyone is a choice that you make. I choose to love myself as I am right now. Simple.

I didn't say that I have to love my behaviors, though. After all, I'm an evolving human being, and that means that I am working toward a better vision of myself every day. And so, part of becoming the ME I want to be is examining and changing the behaviors I need to change in order to become the highest vision of who I want to become. And the best news in the world is I am the only one who can make those changes. And I am all powerful in choosing new patterns, new thinking, and new results. I am the creator of the ME that I currently am, and I am also the creator of the ME that I am want to become. So, with love and dedication, I become the ultimate ME!

It's really easy for me to see this, but I know that some people struggle with loving themselves. Some people talk trash to themselves so much that they think of themselves as nothing more than worthless trash. As a man thinks, so is he. So, if you're a prisoner of that trash talk or "stinking thinking," you have to make a big change and start singing a new song to yourself. Start with this one: if you can't be with the Me you love, love the ME you are. And start saying kind and encouraging and loving things to yourself.

Here are some positive affirmations to begin with:

I am beautiful in every way, inside and out.

I am worth the trouble of doing anything I can to help myself.

I am becoming the ME I have always wanted to be.

I am smart and capable.

I learn things easily and have fun learning new things.

I feel great!

I love myself and I love others.

I love myself enough to take care of myself.

I am a good person, and I make good choices.

I care about what I think, what I say, and what I do.

You can make your own affirmations by making positive statements that you would say to a dear friend. Only say these things to yourself. If you hear yourself say something that is negative or hurtful to yourself, stop, and immediately change the statement into something loving and positive. Come to your own defense! If you heard someone say some of the things you say to yourself, to your best friend, you would come to your friend's defense. So, if you hear yourself calling yourself names like stupid or dummy, don't take it. Say, "Stop! I am a smart person. I may have made a poor choice, but from now own, I make good choices!" If you hear yourself telling yourself something like, "You are so lazy. You'll never get an exercise program going," just say right back to yourself, "Stop! I am a person who cares about myself and my health. I am moving more and exercising more every day. I love to move and exercise." It may sound a little crazy to you, but it works. I am here to testify that it really changes things if you stop saying negative things and start saying positive things. And pretty soon, you'll be loving yourself just the way you are. And you'll be caring about yourself enough to do the things you must do in order to change yourself into the highest vision you have of yourself. I promise you!

Love yourself, be gentle with yourself, be kind to yourself. Nurture yourself as you strive to become the one you love today and the one you will love even more tomorrow.